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Earl Hightower Steps 6 and 7 – Recovered 907

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  1. Episode Sponsorship  We will recognize you by first name only at the top, mid, and end of the episode.  Any amount will qualify.
  2. Premium Membership  This is the single most effective way to support the show.  Watch the video in its entirety and learn how to become Premium

Call and leave a message and become part of the show

http://recoveredcast.com/speakpipe

Check out this episode!

Earl Hightower Steps 3 through 5 – Recovered 906

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These weekend episodes are typically reserved for our Premium Subscribers.  Our Premium Members are the reason why the Recovered Podcast is still online.  Please consider upgrading today.

Our generous Recovered Podcast Community allows us to be self supporting and not rely on outside contributions.  If you would like to join us, there are two ways.

  1. Episode Sponsorship  We will recognize you by first name only at the top, mid, and end of the episode.  Any amount will qualify.
  2. Premium Membership  This is the single most effective way to support the show.  Watch the video in its entirety and learn how to become Premium

Call and leave a message and become part of the show

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Becoming a Sponsor – Recovered 905

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Our generous Recovered Podcast Community allows us to be self supporting and not rely on outside contributions.  If you would like to join us, there are two ways.

  1. Episode Sponsorship  We will recognize you by first name only at the top, mid, and end of the episode.  Any amount will qualify.
  2. Premium Membership  This is the single most effective way to support the show.  Watch the video in its entirety and learn how to become Premium

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Alcoholics Anonymous began with sponsorship.

When Bill W., only a few months sober,

was stricken with a powerful urge to drink, this

thought came to him: “You need another alcoholic

to talk to. You need another alcoholic just as much

as he needs you!”

He found Dr. Bob, who had been trying desperately

and unsuccessfully to stop drinking, and out

of their common need A.A. was born. The word

“sponsor” was not used then; the Twelve Steps had

not been written; but Bill carried the message to

Dr. Bob, who in turn safeguarded his own sobriety

by sponsoring countless other alcoholics. Through

sharing, both of our co-founders discovered, their

own sober lives could be enriched beyond measure.

What does A.A. mean by sponsorship? To join

some organizations, you must have a sponsor ?

a person who vouches for you, presents you as

being suitable for membership. This is definitely

not the case with A.A. Anyone who has a desire to

stop drinking is welcome to join us!

 

What was your understanding of a sponsor when you were new?

 

How did this understanding evolve?

 

When did you first become a sponsor?

 

What were your concerns and fears?

 

How does sponsorship help the sponsor?

 

Can any member be a sponsor?

 

When is a member ready for

sponsorship responsibility?

 

What does a sponsor do and not do?

 

Is there any one best way of

sponsoring a newcomer?

 

How can a sponsor explain

the A.A. program?

 

Should a sponsor recommend

hospitalization?

 

How can a sponsor work with

an alcoholic’s family?

 

Should a sponsor lend money

to a newcomer?

 

Should a sponsor intercede

with an employer?

 

Can a sponsor be too firm?

 

Can a sponsor

be overprotective?

 

Can a sponsor be too casual?

 

How can a sponsor handle an

overdependent newcomer?

 

How can a sponsor work with

a newcomer who rejects help?

 

When newcomers resist

“the spiritual side” of the program,

what can sponsors do?

 

How should a sponsor deal with slips?

 

Can a member sponsor more than

one newcomer simultaneously?

Check out this episode!

Call Recovered About Becoming A Sponsor

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Tuesday Night, the Recovery Topic is “Becoming a Sponsor”
 
Through
sharing, both of our co-founders discovered, their
own sober lives could be enriched beyond measure.
What does A.A. mean by sponsorship? To join
some organizations, you must have a sponsor —
a person who vouches for you, presents you as
being suitable for membership. This is definitely
not the case with A.A. Anyone who has a desire to
stop drinking is welcome to join us!
Let’s talk about this solution.  Tap Speakpipe (preferred because the sound quality is excellent.  Use this method especially if you are outside the Unites States) or call 1-734-288-7510 and answer the following question(s):
Recovered Podcast is live online every Tuesday at 6:30 pm EST as we record the show.  Join the fun and be part of the show.
What were your fears when you first became a sponsor?
How does being a sponsor help you?
If you would like to listen to the live stream of the show, just tap Recovered Chat and Live Stream.  
 
Click on our Show Notes we will use.

Recovered 904 – Earl Hightower Steps 3 through 5

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These Weekend Episodes are usually only for Premium members.  Premium membership is the sole reason why Recovered is still online.  If you think Recovered is of value, please consider helping the new guy to the program by becoming a Premium Member.

Our generous Recovered Podcast Community allows us to be self supporting and not rely on outside contributions.  If you would like to join us, there are two ways.

  1. Episode Sponsorship  We will recognize you by first name only at the top, mid, and end of the episode.  Any amount will qualify.
  2. Premium Membership  This is the single most effective way to support the show.  Watch the video in its entirety and learn how to become Premium

Call and leave a message and become part of the show

http://recoveredcast.com/speakpipe

Check out this episode!

Family and Recovery – Recovered 902

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Our generous Recovered Podcast Community allows us to be self supporting and not rely on outside contributions.  If you would like to join us, there are two ways.

  1. Episode Sponsorship  We will recognize you by first name only at the top, mid, and end of the episode.  Any amount will qualify.
  2. Premium Membership  This is the single most effective way to support the show.  Watch the video in its entirety and learn how to become Premium

Call Us Now  http://recoveredcast.com/speakpipe

When addiction strikes a family, it often breaks up into a series of roles. These roles are typically similar to the family member’s past behaviors. These roles are many but the most common ones can be described in the following way: the person suffering from addiction, the enabler, the hero, the scapegoat, and the mascot. While not every family will be large enough to fill these roles or the many others, members do change roles at various times.

The person who is struggling with addiction is obviously the focus of the family unit in this circumstance. The role of everyone else will be reliant on the way they interact with this person.

When there is addiction in a family, the whole family is sick. Family is deeply involved in the struggle with addiction, which means it is very important for them to become involved in their own recovery. This is not just about supporting the individual overcoming the addiction, but about creating a healthy environment for themselves.

What came first to mind?

When you first came in, how did you see your disease affect your family?
Do you see the hero, scapegoat, enabler in your family?
What do those labels mean to you?
Why do you think these people fell into these roles?
What was communication like with your family of origin when you were using?

How do you see recovery affecting your family of origin?
How does recovery affect your immediate family?

Exploring the past is important in recovery, why is this true for you?
How do secrets and denial keep a family sick?
Why are secrets and denial common in the alcoholic family?

Is there alcoholism in your family other than you?
Is there recovery in your family other than you?
Is your immediate family part of a recovery program?

We Have Calls!

Mike from FLA
https://www.speakpipe.com/messages

Elizabeth
https://www.speakpipe.com/messages

Check out this episode!

Recovered 901 – Earl Hightower Steps 1 and 2

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Our generous Recovered Podcast Community allows us to be self supporting and not rely on outside contributions.  If you would like to join us, there are two ways.

  1. Episode Sponsorship  We will recognize you by first name only at the top, mid, and end of the episode.  Any amount will qualify.
  2. Premium Membership  This is the single most effective way to support the show.  Watch the video in its entirety and learn how to become Premium

Call and leave a message and become part of the show

http://recoveredcast.com/speakpipe

 

Check out this episode!

Call Recovered About Family and Recovery

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Tuesday Night, the Recovery Topic is Family and Recovery.”
 
When addiction strikes a family, it often breaks up into a series of roles. These roles are typically similar to the family member’s past behaviors. These roles are many but the most common ones can be described in the following way: the person suffering from addiction, the enabler, the hero, the scapegoat, and the mascot. While not every family will be large enough to fill these roles or the many others, members do change roles at various times.
 
Let’s talk about this solution.  Tap Speakpipe (preferred because the sound quality is excellent.  Use this method especially if you are outside the Unites States) or call 1-734-288-7510 and answer the following question(s):
 
When you first came in, how did you see your disease affect your family?
What was communication like with your family of origin when you were using?
How do secrets and denial keep a family sick?
Why are secrets and denial common in the alcoholic family?
Is your family part of a recovery program?
 
Recovered Podcast is live online every Tuesday at 6:30 pm EST as we record the show.  Join the fun and be part of the show. 
If you would like to listen to the live stream of the show, just tap Recovered Chat and Live Stream.  
 
Click on our Show Notes we will use.

Check out this episode!

Take Our One Question Survey

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On Tuesday, our recovery topic will be “Family and Recovery.”

Take our one question survey to help us prepare for the show.
Just click HERE.
On Tuesdays at 6:30 pm EST, we stream the audio of the Recovered Podcast Live.  If you would like to join the fun and interact with the show hosts and other listeners as we record the show live, just click HERE for the link and more information.

Do we want to get better? – Article by Author Annie Highwater

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Do we want to get better?

 

We are five years into this process of recovery after many years of crisis, trauma and all of the after-effects.  It has taken time to come to a place of peace, strength and confidence.

As well, it takes time to find consistent calm in life.  It was often hard, soul searching work.

Early on in my efforts to improve my life I was asked by a seasoned recovery expert: “Do you really want to get better?”

Strange question. Shouldn’t that be obvious?  Doesn’t everyone?

But, we have all known someone who has a slew of problems, often unloads them to you, yet has a reason to doubt every possible solution.  While repeatedly returning to their mess only to come back later with a new round of similar complaints.

I’ve seen it countless times.  More than a few times I’ve lived it.

The natural questions that come to mind are, does this person want a better life? Or do they just want to be comforted.  Do they simply want attention and company as they remain in their misery?

Getting better is hard work.  It takes effort to change and create a more peaceful, healthy life. It’s not easy breaking out of the very problems we are sometimes identified by.

An Article in Psychology Today written by David Sack, M.D. mentions the theory that people like negative feelings. A study by Eduardo Andrade and Joel Cohen, which evaluated why people enjoy horror movies, concluded that some of the viewers were “happy to be unhappy.”

Researchers found that people experience both negative and positive emotions at the same time, meaning they not only enjoy the relief they feel when the threat is removed but also enjoy being scared. This same theory, they argued, may help explain why humans are drawn to extreme sports and other risky activities that elicit terror or disgust.

As people we are layered.  What might present on the surface as misery, could subconsciously be a familiar, comfortable identity we fear moving out of.

CHARACTERISTICS OF THE CHRONICALLY UNHAPPY

How do you know if you’re one of these people who live in a perpetual state of unhappiness? People who are addicted to unhappiness tend to:

  • Find reasons to be miserable when life gets “too good.”
  • Prefer to play the victim role and blame others rather than take personal responsibility for their choices.
  • Have difficulty setting and achieving goals, or conversely achieve goals only to find that they can’t enjoy their success.
  • Struggle to bounce back when things don’t go their way.
  • Distract, escape or cope by using drugs, alcohol, sex, food, or other addictive or compulsive behaviors.
  • Stop taking care of their basic needs, such as a healthy diet, regular exercise, and adequate sleep.
  • Feel enslaved to their emotions and powerless to change.
  • Feel dissatisfied even when life is going well.
  • Have dramatic, unfulfilling relationships.

When someone is in the midst of misery and trauma it’s understandable to be a mess.

When trauma and triggers reoccur, we can naturally return to misery.

When we live chronically miserable, there can be a medical issue.  Or maybe it’s time for a wake-up call.

I have a friend who lived for a great length of time understandably swallowed up in sorrow over the circumstances of her family.  Addiction was ravaging more than a few people she dearly loved.  It was affecting her terribly; to the point she almost couldn’t function.

One evening she sat with a group of women who listened again as her tears, pain and worry poured out.  One of them leaned in to her and said “At some point, you’re going to have to stop the mourning, stand up tall and figure out how to fight!”

My friend was at first startled and offended.  But then she felt empowered.

After that day, she continued to allow herself a span of time to melt down when the weight of life felt crushing.  But after a few minutes, she’d take a breath, straighten her back and fight through it.

Sometimes pulling out a notebook to write down ideas of what she could do to make progress.

Sometimes she turned to trusted counsel for advice.  Sometimes she simply prayed (or breathed) her way through the situation moment by moment.

Whatever was needed to find peace, strength and serenity.

And to not remain stuck.

RECOVERY IS NOT ONE SIZE FITS ALL.

It’s a different process for everyone.  We have to figure out what gives us strength and courage to take steps toward progress.  Sometimes it’s melting down for a while, sometimes we need snapped out of it.

Whatever it takes, recovery, peace and positivity are possible.

Happiness is complicated. Some people find happiness even in situations that would challenge the most optimistic person.  Others are unhappy despite having it all. For some, happiness is fleeting and depends on their present circumstances, whereas others seem to be generally happy or generally unhappy no matter what is happening in their lives.

There are people living in the midst of great suffering who are positive and grateful.  There are those who have every need seemingly met, surrounded by family, friends and wealth and yet are full of misery.  It can often traced back to their mindset.

Tony Robbins often says our mind is not built to make us happy, it’s built to keep us alive.  Therefore, it’s naturally trained to look for what is wrong, that is a survival skill. It takes discipline to direct it out of negativity and onto what is positive and hopeful.

There will always be bad days, pain, difficulties and challenges.

What we do with the hand we’re dealt is what matters.

Think of life (and recovery) as a marathon.  The race always hurts.  Expect it to hurt. You don’t train so it doesn’t hurt, you train so you can tolerate it…and keep going.

“You can’t be grateful for crisis, grief, tragedy or misery.  But at every moment you have an opportunity to do something with what life has given you.  Grateful living means learning to avail yourself moment by moment to that opportunity.” ~Brother David Stendl-Rast

Still learning,

Annie

Author of Unhooked